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How To Stay Connected Through COVID-19

By: Alexis H, Teen CHARGE Staff Member

COVID 19 took us all by surprise. Our normal routines of work, school, hanging out with family and friends completely shifted. Now we are stuck wondering: what do we do now? As we settle into the stay at home order, it’s important that we still stay in touch with those who may not live in our households. Now more than ever, we need a little bit more kindness and love. Here are 10 ways you can connect with loved ones during the pandemic.

Catch up with family (virtually)
Use apps like Facetime, Skype or Zoom (you get 40 minutes free without a membership!) to call and catch up with your family. You can add your grandparents, cousins, etc. to the chat! Sometimes just seeing our loved ones can put a huge smile on our faces.
Have a virtual game night
Get your friends together and play a game. You can do a virtual Kahoot trivia night, card games, virtual scavenger hunts and plenty more. Get creative and try a new way of enjoying your friends company.
Watch a movie “together”
You can do this through apps or just by starting a movie at the same and Facetiming. Start a new show you’ve wanted to watch together, or finally watch all of the MCU movies in order.
Start a Snapchat streak
Snapchat is an easy and fun way to keep up with your friends. It even has gaming options in the app that are perfect for when you’re feeling that afternoon quarantine slump.
Send funny memes to the group chat
Nothing puts a smile on someone’s face like a good laugh. Help keep the group chat positive by sending funny memes you find, or make.
Start a book club
There is always the excuse that we don’t have enough time to read; well now there’s plenty of it! Start a book club with your loved ones and hold meetings virtually.
Play words with friends or other downloadable app games
If you have an Iphone you can play with some of the Imessage games, and if you have an android you can download games like Words with Friends.
TikTok duet with your bff
As we all know, Tik Tok is the rave right now. Text your bff or grab your family and re-create one of the popular trending videos or challenges.
Keep your family and friends up to date with a Facebook post
Facebook is social media for our parents, I get it. However sometimes it’s nice for your older relatives to hear what you are up to if you don’t feel like calling them.
Write them some snailmail
Slow? Yes. Meaningful? Absolutely! Send a card or letter to your friends/family letting them know you’re thinking of them.

Substance Abuse

Smoking Increases Risk of COVID-19

The coronavirus (covid-19) has had a dramatic impact on the world around us. Seemingly overnight, our lives have been completely changed. And while feelings of stress and worry are perfectly natural in times like this, it is important that we learn to manage that stress in a healthy way. This is especially true for people who smoke.

We’ve always known that smoking is not a healthy way to cope. But medical experts have recently given us one more reason why we might want to pass: smoking (marijuana or tobacco) and vaping can increase your risk of not only getting COVID-19, but also experiencing more severe symptoms.

According to the World Health Organization, the very act of smoking increases a person’s risk of contracting the virus. COVID-19 is easily transmitted from hand to mouth (remember, we’re not supposed to be touching our faces!). There is also the possibility that cigarettes themselves may be contaminated; and those who share pipes or other smoking devices are further increasing their risk.

Smoking also compromises the immune system and makes people more susceptible to serious infection. Stanton Glanza, a professor at the University of California San Francisco, states “When someone’s lungs are exposed to flu or other infections, the adverse effects of smoking or vaping are much more serious than among people who do not smoke or vape.” Smoking can increase the chances of COVID-19 becoming more severe by up to fourteen times.

It might feel impossible to start thinking about quitting during a global pandemic. But there are many online resources for people who are looking to quit. Check out smokefree.gov for more information. I also highly recommend downloading the quitSTART app. This free app allows you to track your progress, unlock achievements, get support from an online community, and play games and challenges to distract yourself from cravings. Remember that quitting is a process and that takes time.

In the meantime, we need to focus on healthy and positive ways to manage stress. Every person is different and it’s important to find what works for you. If you aren’t interested in exercising or meditation (two common stress relievers), why not try something creative? Painting while listening to music is a great way to take your mind off of what’s going on in the world. Or maybe you prefer being in nature. Taking a walk while enjoying creation’s beauty is a wonderful way to unwind.

Whatever you choose, the important thing is that you find a way to manage stress that does not compromise your health, or make you more susceptible to serious health problems. Smoking may feel like an easy fix when you’re overwhelmed, but the problems it creates in the long run are not worth it.

For more information on coping with stress related to COVID-19, check out the Official CDC Page for recommendations..

—————————————————–
1. “Q&A On Smoking and COVID-19.” World Health Organization, World Health Organization, 24 Mar. 2020, www.who.int/news-room/q-a-detail/q-a-on-smoking-and-covid-19

2 Martin EM, Clapp PW, et al. E-cigarette use results in suppression of immune and inflammatory-response genes in nasal epithelial cells similar to cigarette smoke. Am J Physiol Lung Cell Mol Physiol2016;311:L135-44.
doi:10.1152/ajplung.00170.2016 pmid:27288488. Accessed 31 March, 2020.

3. Yu, Gina. CNN, Turner Broadcasting System, Inc., 20 Mar. 2020, www.cnn.com/2020/03/20/health/coronavirus-vaping-drugs/index.html. Accessed 23 Mar. 2020.

Parents

Teens & Social Media pt. 1

by: Gina Boscarino, Teen CHARGE staff member

Recently, I came across my old journals from middle school. As I cringed my way through the dramatic ramblings (fueled by teenage angst and the music of the late 90s- early 2000s) I just kept having the same thought- thank GOD social media wasn’t a thing when I was in my teens and tweens.

For so many of today’s kids, social media has become a sort of diary-a place to share their deepest feelings and frustrations without having to say things out loud. And while it CAN be a wonderful tool for self-expression, the fact that their thoughts are so easily accessible to others can end up being dangerous, embarrassing, and even damaging to their future.

We’ve all heard that once you post something on the internet, it never really goes away. Despite privacy settings and the option to delete posts, anything you share can come back to haunt you. And while this is a difficult concept for many adults to grasp (how many of us have posted something and immediately regretted it?), this is even more difficult for teens to understand.

A lot of that has to do with brain development. The teen brain develops from back to front. The last part of the brain to develop is the frontal lobe, sometimes called the logical part of the brain, which allows us to think through the consequences of our actions and regulate emotional responses. As a result, teens tend to utilize the amygdala more, and make decisions based on emotions and feelings. Unfortunately, as many parents are aware, this doesn’t always result in the best choices.

When it comes to social media, this can lead to the perfect storm. Take a highly reactive and emotional teenager, with little capacity to think through the consequences of their actions. Combine that with a strong desire for self-expression, recognition, and peer approval. Then give that teen a platform with which to share all of their thoughts and feelings with the rest of the world. Is it any wonder that so many teens have a hard time navigating what to share and what not to share on social media?

The good news is that teens can be taught to use social media safely and responsibility. It just takes some guidance from a caring adult. Below are some tips for helping your students.

• Talk to them about why it’s important. Help kids to understand the permanency of the things they post. Even deleted images can be retrieved or saved in a screenshot. Remind them that friends and family are not the only ones who can see the things they post. Future employers, college recruiters, and even volunteer coordinators will look at a person’s social media accounts before making a decision.

• Monitor. Keep an eye on what your child is doing on social media. For younger tweens, you may want to create the social media account together so you have the password. Other parents prefer to simply “friend” or “follow” their kids, but if this makes you uncomfortable or feels like an invasion of privacy, you can also do periodic check-ins with your child. I know one mom who periodically sits down with her teenage son and has him login to his account so she can see what he has been posting. As he told me, “I never post anything bad because I never know when she is going to see it.” These “check ins” are part of an agreement they made several years ago, and were one of the stipulations of allowing him to have his own social media accounts.

• Teach them to ask the right questions. Encourage teens to ask themselves the following before they decide to post something on social media:

Will this cause drama or hurt feelings? (Even if you aren’t friends with someone on social media, it’s NEVER a good idea to post anything that could be hurtful!!!)

Would I be comfortable showing this to my Grandmother/Aunt/Pastor/other adult I admire?

Is this consistent with my morals and values?

How might this affect my future prospects, in terms of getting a job or getting into college?

What message does it send to others about who I am?

Could this cause me pain or embarrassment in the future? (This especially applies to posts about girlfriends/boyfriends! They may feel like the love of your life this week, but you may regret saying that in a month!)

Many people also use the THINK acronym.

Stay tuned for part 2, when we talk about phone apps and other ways to keep kids safe online!

Parents

Risk & Protective Factors

by: Leo Preston, Teen CHARGE Production Manager

When it comes to parenting, a goal you may have for your child is for them to live a holistic healthy life (social, emotional, intellectual, physical, spiritual, and vocational/recreational), so that they may become a confident, independent adult. Although this may be the goal, there are factors in life that can either help or hinder the child’s holistic growth and development. These are called risk and protective factors.

Risk factors are conditions/situations that increase the likelihood of someone engaging in risky behaviors (substance use/violence/unsafe sexual practices), engaging in or staying in unhealthy relationships, acquiring a mental health issue, and/or exasperating an already existing mental health issue. These factors in a person’s life can be paralleled to the weakened wall of a castle’s defenses which make it easier for invaders to take over the castle keep.

Protective factors, on the other hand, are conditions/situations that inhibit or reduce the likelihood of someone engaging in unsafe relationships or risky behaviors, acquiring a mental health issue, and/or exasperating a current mental health issue. These factors in a person’s life can be equated to a castle’s warriors that fend off invaders, despite the weakened structure of the castle’s wall.

Image result for the king's army fantasy

Now that these factors have been defined, it is important to note that risk and protective factors are derived from multiple facets in a person’s life: Family, Community, School, and Individual. Consider the below picture:

Risk Factors	Protective Factors
Community
Poverty Limited access to healthcare Poor community resources Neighborhood crime and violence Few recreational outlets Social discrimination Overcrowding Exposure to trauma/violence	Range of supportive adults Access to effective services Strong resources religious institutions Neighborhood safety Supervised recreation
Family
Family history of mental illness Parental crime/incarceration Familial abuse/neglect Familial substance abuse Lack of parental support Family isolation Large family size Death of a caregiver Chronic Illness (Physical/Mental)	Familial support Familial focus on wellness Family life with clear rules Consistent enforcement
School
Underachieving schools Peer rejection/isolation	Strong school involvement Quality schools Strong school-home bond
Individual/Peer
Impulsivity Aggressive/violent behavior Disregard for others Sensation seeking Attachment issues Poor Interpersonal Boundaries Hopelessness Low Self-Esteem Exposure to Alcohol & Drugs Low Intelligence Substance Use Apathy/Emotional Blunting Unhealthy relationships Traumatic events Delinquency	Self-Control Decision-making skills Good social skills Cares for others Healthy eating habits Healthy physical wellness Practicing spirituality Strong boundaries Hopeful Positive self-outlook Appropriate attachment Good communication skills Regulates emotion

These lists may not include everything, but it definitely provides a strong look into the depth of factors that affect the development of your student’s holistic health.

Since then, the relationship between the two factors is important especially when considering the idea of building resilience. Resilience is a person’s ability to “bounce back” from adverse conditions or situations. Essentially, resilience is when a person is moving forward despite the effects of the risk factors in their life. According to a study done by the National Institute for Mental Health, it was concluded that a person’s resilience is made stronger when the protective factors outweigh the risk factors.

Now then, as you continue to parent your child towards the goal of living a healthy holistic life, help your student to identify the current risk and protective factors in their life. Through this process, if it becomes evident that there are more risk factors than protective factors, then it would be beneficial to brainstorm ways to increase the protective factors. This may or may not be difficult to do; however, it will help you and your student to build resilience for life.

NOTE: One place to start talking about protective factors could be going through the an asset checklist with your student found here:
https://www.search-institute.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/AssetChecklist.pdf

References

About Whole Person Wellness. (20 May 2019). Retrieved from http://hdcs.fullerton.edu/csa/WholePerson/about.htm

D. (20 May 2019). Risk and Protective Factors. Retrieved from https://www.americanmentalwellness.org/prevention/risk-and-protective-factors/

Vanderbilt-Adriance, E., & Shaw, D. S. (2008, August). Protective factors and the development of resilience in the context of neighborhood disadvantage. Retrieved from https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2683035/

Parents

Anxious

My name is Emma. I am a 15 year old high school student and I have anxiety. A few years ago I was diagnosed with a generalized anxiety disorder. My therapist thinks I have had it my whole life, though. May is mental health awareness month, this is really important because it provides a platform to inform people about this issue.

People of all ages deal with mental health issues, but I am most familiar with teens with these issues (I also have to experience with mental health past teen years since I am still a teen).

Too often, teenagers who are legitimately dealing with depression, anxiety, etc. are told that they are “just being teenagers.” This is not only frustrating, but can be dangerous. If a teen is acting depressed for a long period of time, or shows an abnormally low amount of motivation to eat, go outside, interact with people, or generally take care of themselves. These are all possible signs of depression and parents and friends need to take these things seriously.

Anxiety can be harder to see. First of all, I cannot stress enough how different being anxious and having an anxiety disorder are. Everyone experiences some form of anxiety at some point in their lives, this can be heightened when someone is in high school due to chemical imbalance, friend drama, school work, etc. but this does not mean they aren’t normal. Stress is something that isn’t inherently bad for you. For example, if you are being chased by a bear, being stressed send your body into “alright time to run,” mode. However, if someone has an anxiety disorder, their body essentially acts like a bear is chasing them 24/7.

I have compiled some advice for parents who know or suspect their teenager has anxiety or depression and aren’t sure what to do.

Approach is everything.

If your child thinks that you are upset at them for not telling you they were struggling, they will shut down faster than anything you say afterwards to try and reach them.

2. Do not use any variation of the phrase, “It’s a teenager thing.”

This includes: “That’s pretty common for teens. “

“You’re just being an angsty teen.”

“A lot of kids feel like that.”

“You’ll grow out of it.”

It does not matter if it’s true, they will not want to hear it.

Instead, I recommend: “You don’t feel like this is normal?”

“Do you feel like part of it is this time in your life? Or no?”

Or, what I feel is the best approach overall. Just simply: “Tell me about it.” and “What do you think is a good next step? What do you want me to do to help?”

Overall, I hope the biggest take away would be that even though mental health issues can be hard to detect and deal with, there is a right approach to addressing these issues. Lastly, if they just aren’t ready to talk about it, that’s ok. Showing them that you are with them through it all speaks volumes to them. Unless you suspect or know that they are harming themselves or others, giving them space can be the most helpful sometimes.

-Emma, 15

Mental Health

AHHHHH! Stress!

Parents, family, relationships, athletics, performances, speeches, exams, world/local news, politics, graduation, college, this weekend, appearances, hair, likes/follows on social media, and other such things consume the mind which, in turn, applies pressure to our thoughts and emotions. This pressure can also be known as stress. Due to the fact that April is Stress Awareness month, it is only fitting that we discuss this consuming aspect of life.

According to Webster’s dictionary, stress is a “constraining force or influence”. An example that it give is “a force exerted when one body or body part presses on, pulls on, pushes against, or tends to compress or twist another body or body part”. Going further with the definition, psychologists, such as Richard Lazarus, express that stress is “one’s perception of harm/threat” of a particular situation, thought, or feeling. Consider the picture below:

Essentially, a person feels the initial stressor (say studying for the Math Final Exam). That person is faced with the first appraisal (or question) is this a challenge (something I can overcome or find personal growth) or is this a threat (something that is too overwhelm and may cause me harm)? If the person decides harm, then the second appraisal is met: do I have the resources to appropriately deal with this threat. The answer to the second appraisal determines how the person sees the threat. How the person sees the threat determines how the person responds. Going back to the above-mentioned stressor, the Math Final Exam, the flow of stress perception could look like:

There are times that we are able to appropriately deal with our stressors of life with ease. This is because we see them as mere challenges. These challenges considered good stress: getting better in a particular sport, skill, increasing your grades in school, etc. These challenges motivate us to better ourselves, and we respond accordingly. However, it is the stressors that we see as threats that immobilize and/or debilitate our bodies, or push us irrational, self-sabotaging behaviors in order to cope such as violence, drug-use, and unprotected sex to name a few.

It is in these moments that it is important to implement positive ways to deal with the stressors in our life; after all, stress will always be a part of our life regardless of age, gender, socioeconomic status, religion, politics, or how many likes you have on your IG posts. Here are some suggestions for dealing with everyday stressors:

Author: Leo Preston, Teen CHARGE Production Manager

References

Stress. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/stress?src=search-dict-box

Stress. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/stress

Stress, Lifestyle, and Health – Scientific Figure on ResearchGate. Available from: https://www.researchgate.net/figure/When-encountering-a-stressor-a-person-judges-its-potential-threat-primary-appraisal_fig2_291348598.

Mental Health

My Brother has Autism

Throughout all of my life, I have witnessed my older brother reach milestones that I would have never thought he could reach. When we were children, whenever he spoke he could never use his own words to describe how he felt. He could “script”, mimic scenes verbatim from movies, television shows, or other influential external sources, but he could not use his own voice to say exactly what he wanted to say. As the years passed he shed some of his scripting tendencies, and he could communicate in his own words with his peers, teachers, and our parents more effectively.

After he started going to his first couple therapy sessions, he was a little more reflective and thoughtful than before–where he would usually go close himself off in his room with an electronic device of some sort before and be solely focused on his wants and needs–and he was able to articulate his feelings more and not feel as frustrated due to not utilizing an outlet in which to transcribe his thoughts and emotions, such as journaling or practicing his piano.

Within this past year, he started taking medication to help calm him down for the first time and began ABA therapy – where he and his other therapist participate in social situations outside of the home. So far he has been the most thoughtful, diligent, and more helpful than ever before. Even though we are siblings and engage in petty fights with each other, I am so proud of the person that he is and is continuing to become.

He has had to overcome more challenges than I will ever know, like the hundreds of times throughout his academic career he has been maliciously teased for his sensitivity to certain sounds such as whistling and humming or having realized that he just does not understand the world like his neurotypical peers do. Even growing up with my autistic brother, autism is so complex and unique that it can be difficult to sift through all of the medical studies, reputablably sourced articles and the several advocacy groups with tons of information. So, with autism being one of the fastest growing neurological conditions in the world, it is of the utmost importance to educate the population about autism to increase understanding and decrease the amount of bullying that occurs for autistic individuals.

What is Autism?

Autism is a term used to describe a broad range of similarly characterized behavioral disorders whose effects vary person to person, because of the tremendous variation in its type and severity doctors will place their diagnoses on the autism spectrum. People who are diagnosed with autism generally do not pick up on the social cues and social behaviors, and may have a difficult time engaging in social interactions- both verbally and physically. There is widespread emphasis on receiving a diagnosis for autism at an early age.

Symptoms of Autism

Different sensory experiences–i.e. Heightened sensitivity to light and sounds, or synesthesia
May focus on restricted interests
Repetitive behaviors
Delay or difficulty in learning language or lack of functional speaking
Social communication challenges–i.e lack of eye contact
Lack of interest or difficulty in developing and maintaining relationships with peers
Need for consistency and routine

Even though autism is as unique as the people who possess it, these are common symptoms that are usually recognizable across the board. Depending upon the culture in which the individual is from, it can increase or decrease their likelihood of being diagnosed because social cues are differently defined than in the United States.

What Causes Autism?

There is not just one cause for autism. According to The National Institute of Mental Health,” research suggests that genes act together with influences from the environment to affect development in ways that lead to ASD.” Autism generally tends to occur more in people who have a sibling with autism, having older parents, displaying a very low birth weight, and certain medical conditions that bear similarities to autism, such as tourettes, “fragile X syndrome, tuberous sclerosis, congenital rubella syndrome and untreated phenylketonuria (PKU)”, (Autism Society) and many more.

Treatments

While there is no “cure all” for Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), there are several different kinds of treatment for the myriad of kinds presented. Typically, the majority of those with ASD respond best to highly structured and specialized programs. Programs such as cognitive behavior therapy, physical therapy, social skills training, and behavioral management therapy, along with medication treatment, are among the most popular forms of treatment for those with ASD.

The American Academy for Pediatrics encourages parents to have their children screened for developmental delays and for specifically for autistic characteristics as well. It is imperative that young people, as well as adults, strive to receive a doctor’s diagnosis.

-Sierra, NVHS

Sources

Global Autism Project
Autism Speaks
The National Institute of Child Health and Human Development
The Autism Society
National PKU Alliance
Disabilities Study Quarterly
Psychology Today
Autistic Self Advocacy Network
The National Institute of Mental Health
American Academy for Pediatrics

Parents

THE FOUR PARENTING STYLES

Each parent has a vision of how they want to raise their children. Some have an idea of particular vocational/education pursuits in mind for the child to pursue, or even social/relational goals for the child. Moreover, each parent also has particular lessons that they desire for their children as they grow to into adulthood such as concepts of respect, love, justice, or morality to name a few. Therefore, in order for the parent to help their child navigate through life to reach the particular vision and goals set for their child, each parent develops and implements a particular style of parenting.

Even though each parent may have unique visions and goals for their child, there are commonalities between how parents tend to raise their children. Psychological researchers and theorists have identified that the style a parent uses in raising children can be related to two measurable factors: responsiveness (amount of support/warmth given to the child) and demandingness (expectations/control placed on the child). When considering these two factors, it has been said that there are essentially four parenting styles: authoritarian, permissive, disengaged, and authoritative.

AUTHORITARIAN

This style of parenting is HIGH in demandingness, but LOW in responsiveness. An indication of this parenting style is that the parent holds the child to strong expectations, but gives very little room for the child to make mistakes. Some parents might refer to this style as “tough love” as it is heavy on punishment as corrective action.

Pros: Children conform to parental authority and standards, and will create high expectations for oneself. Parent has ultimate control.

Cons: Children will most likely rebel against rules in future. They may see their relationships and situations with rigidity. It is also indicative that the child will have lower self-esteem due to the high expectation place on self.

PERMISSIVE

This style of parenting is HIGH in responsiveness, but LOW in demandingness. This style can be indicated when the parent is seen as the child’s “friend”. The parent comes across as very caring and warm to the emotional needs of the child. Yet, when it comes to rules and expectations, the parent expects nothing or very little. The child & parent are seen as equals in household authority.

Pros: The emotional bond between the parent & child is really strong. The child is able to share thoughts and feelings with the parent openly. Child may feel as though they have freedom.

Cons: The parent’s expectations are chaotic, if not non-existent, which could mislead the child to believe that the child “do whatever”. Child can learn how to manipulate the parent due to lack of strong expectations. Child may hold other authority figures in contempt as the attitude is “rules don’t matter”.

DISENGAGED

This style of parenting is LOW in both demandingness and responsiveness. Parents that use this style take a “hands-off” approach. This means that there are very little to no expectations on the children. However, it also means that the children also get very little to no attention from the parent with regard to emotional, mental, or even physical support. Essentially, the child learns everything on their own.

Pros: Children have freedom to seemingly “do whatever” they want. The world is theirs to explore. Children learn lessons from the parent indirectly or not at all.

Cons: Children miss out on the direct support that comes from parental engagement. Children may grow up without a strong identity of who they are.

AUTHORITATIVE

This style of parenting is HIGH in both demandingness and responsiveness. A parent here shows balance of creating and maintaining strong expectations for child with offering the child the room to grow through making mistakes along the journey. Parents here walk alongside children regardless of what the child is going through.

Pros: Children will tend to respect expectations laid on them, and will most likely discuss their thoughts and feelings with the parent. It incubates a strong bond between parent and child.

Cons: For the parent, it takes work and time to develop which can be exhausting. However, for the child there this seems to be the style that encourages growth into a well-adjusted adult.

As a parent, you have quite the undertaking; remember your children, regardless of age, look to you for the direct support that they need to navigate the murky waters of life. Your parenting style creates the environment for your child to learn who they are in this world. You set the pace for the developmental growth of your child. Your contributions to your children are highly valued by them, even if they don’t directly inform you of this.

Author: Leo Preston, Teen CHARGE Production Manager

Broderick, P. C., & Blewitt, P. (2015). The life span: human development for helping professionals (Fourth edition). Boston: Pearson.

sex

Love or Infatuation?

We all know certain people that are so head over heels for their boyfriend or girlfriend that friendships seem to take a back seat. Shoot! You may even relate to this from your current or past romantic relationship. For some people, this is a common train of thought: “I’m with my special someone, so I need to spend every waking moment with that person”. Yet, the question to be asked is whether or not this train of thought references love or infatuation.

In our culture, we have one word for ‘love’ and use it for everything we like, enjoy, and cherish: “I love pizza!”; “I love the dog!”; “I love you!” According to the Greeks, there are actually four kinds of love: affection, friendship, desire, & unconditional. Each word references a type of love, but it’s not the same word used in different situations. When considering the feelings that one might have for their special someone how do these four definitions of love resonate with that relationship?

The Love Test

Try going 30 days without any physical contact and see if your relationship lasts. Is it love or infatuation?

If you want to know if it’s love, set a boundary. Say, “I don’t want you to cross this line”. Love = respect. If they love you, they will respect your boundaries and not only care about what’s best for them but also what’s best for YOU!

Don’t want to deal with depression and looking for real love? You may want to Avoid the Risk.

sex

Teen Pregnancy

In romantic relationships, the question that will inevitably arise is whether or not to engage in sexual intercourse. After all, for some young couples, this act may seem like the ‘typical’ next step in a relationship. However, if not exhaustively discussed ahead of time, or if strong boundaries are not established or followed, then decisions could be made based on the intense emotions of the moment. Decisions that could potential change one’s life forever, especially for a teenager.

According to the US Department of Health and Human Services, research shows that “about 77 percent of teen pregnancies are unplanned. In other words, they are unwanted or occurred “too soon.” This means that these teens who became pregnant after engaging in sexual intercourse weren’t ready to take on the responsibilities that come along with pregnancy.

In order to be fully prepared to take on this responsibility, a person needs to be a lot more secure in all aspects of life: vocationally, financially, emotionally, mentally, and in their romantic relationship to name a few. Sexual intercourse is not an act that is done without consequences. It is as Sir Isaac Newton said about the 3rd Law of Motion, “For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction”. To put in plainly, if you choose to have sex with your partner, then there is the potential for a pregnancy to occur. The only sure way to prevent teen pregnancy is to decide to wait to have sex until you are more secure in all the aspects of life as mentioned above.